Mark Buxton, Neil Coles & Jason Patient take a break at Elsdon Cyclists Café during a 100+ miles ride around the Cheviots.
Last update 13th April 2000.

Inside this issue of BKN.

A special offer from Closed Road.

Subscriptions (this is in fact a joke, actually so was the special offer above).

Cycling Events

Stuff I've used

Interesting Chain links (honest).

Some photos from holidays and stuff.


Sixteen stone, six feet something Séamus King’s startling April Fools Day revelation.

Editor-in-Chief; Séamus D. King.
Contributing Editor; Somebody Else.
HTML Editor; Séamus D. King.
Photographer & roving reporter; Séamus D. King.
Thanks to; Steve Andrews, Peter Eland and A.N. Other

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Cycling Events

  • The premier cycling event of the year CycleFest 2000 is the place for anyone interested in cycling no matter how extreme their interest.

  • The other premier cycling event of the year Bike Right has been celebrated in Wooler, Northumberland every November since 1996.

  • In May, 27th to 29th, Open Road are having a Try-out Show with lots of unusual cycles to try out.

  • A new cycling event, Spokesfest in Leicester this summer.

  • The CTC are making a bigger show than their usual car extravaganza at York with the, Millenium Festival of Cycling. Will there be more cars than last year?

  • 21st June 2000 marks the official opening of the first 5000 miles of the National Cycling Network . See how Sustrans gets the credit for the work of others as they try to ban bicycles from the roads.
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    Closed Road “Kool?” Belts
    Forget the American studded belts with Harley Davidson motifs, Kool Belts tops the lot. At first glance it looks like an old inner tube but when you notice the valve buckle it dawns on you that they are made out of recycled inner tubes. When we wore these at a recent international trade fair so many people asked what we thought we were doing that we decided to try and flog a limited production run of 50, available only direct from Closed Road.
    These belts are hand made in Birmingham by a machine and utilise genuine Taiwanese inner tubes and realistic fake valves - they even have realistic repair patches on them. What’s more the inner tube rubber is treated with a “Doggie Products Division Alternative Odours” product so that the charateristic odour of rubber is disguised.
    Kool Belt only: 29 pounds. Kool Belt & trousers: 39 pounds.
    The prices include postage and packaging for all UK orders except where destination is in England, Wales, Scotland or Northern Ireland. All other destinations add 5 pounds except rest of the world deliveries add 10 pounds. ORDER FORM.
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    Please Note: in spite of BKN being an obvious joke, our legal departmant have advised us to insert T*****e in place of Trycycle for legal reasons.
    Did You Know...cases of libel are only ever brought to court by people with no sense of humour.
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    Stuff I've used for at least 6 months

    Porelle Dry socks
  • Keep feet dry.
  • & cold unless inner socks are worn.
  • expensive.
  • take days to dry.
  • particulary after washing.
  • difficult to put on.
  • & even harder to get off ( do not use scissors).

    Thermarest mattress
  • supremely comfortable.
  • insulates from the ground.
  • packs away easily.
  • takes up no more space than a karrimat.
  • expensive (what price a good nights sleep?).
  • weighs more than a karrimat.

    Platypus drinks bottle
  • simple, effective drinks container.
  • cheap.
  • weighs little.
  • versatile.
  • can be rolled up to reduce size as contents are used or to pack away when empty.
  • made of polythene.
  • might puncture unexpectedly (mine haven't).
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    Interesting Chain Links (honest).

  • Issue 1 of Byke Kultuur Never.

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    Séamus King’s startling April Fools Day revelation.

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